Clancy . . . overflow . . . the best bits . . . funnies
The Aud$267 million (€155m) deal makes Agfa the largest plate manufacturer in the world, pushing it out in front of KPG. Not that it makes much difference in Australia and New Zealand, where, according to Garry Muratore, Agfa marketing manager, the company has the lion’s share of plates anyway.
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Two lots of variable information printing software come on the market this week. Creo Launches New Variable Information (VI) Toolbox for Optimizing Personalized Job Production on PC, a Windows-based software for entry-level variable-information jobs with Microsoft Word, Adobe PageMaker and other common desktop applications, eliminating the need to learn new applications and processes.
Higher up the food chain Atlas Software BV of The Netherlands, releases two new PrintShop Mail versions for Mac and PC. The company claims 16,000 licenses worldwide, PrintShop Mail and considers itself the number one selling Variable Data Printing program.
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It comes as no surprise that KPG wins first and second prizes for monitor proofing systems in the International Prepress Association’s Color Proofing Roundup. The only question is what other systems were they competing against? The KPG Matchprint Virtual Proofing System has long set the standard for contract quality proofing on the monitor. And now that the company has bought RealTime Image its hold on the emerging technology is stronger than ever.
The full IPA results are hard to come by but for the record the Matchprint Virtual Proofing System and the new Matchprint Virtual Press Side Proofing System won first and second in a visual evaluation of the performance of soft proofing systems. Systems were judged by comparing the display to GRACol (General Requirements for Applications in Commercial Offset Lithography) Press Sheets.
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With sales aids like this you don’t need competitors. MAN Roland continued its gloomy fiscal progress with an AUD$48 million (€28m) loss for this half year. Sales numbers held steady and order were up, and the company attributed the bad result mainly to the costs of Drupa.
You have to ask, what are the German press manufacturers up to, spending huge sums of money to present themselves at the trophy show while steadily going broke?
The print division was the only section of the MAN Group to record a pre-tax loss.
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The trouble at mill (above) comes at the same time as MAN Roland gets the largest web pres order in North America, with 22 presses ordered by Quebecor. It includes 16 Lithoman and Rotoman configured for 48- and 64-page production. While there is no word of how much the order costs, it will likely run into the hundreds of millions. Hard to see how you couldn’t make money out of that.
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And finally . . . here’s report from Andy McCourt of a friend’s experience with a well-known bank. Only the names have been changed to avoid us being sued for our back teeth.
In handling my late aunt's estate, I found that a bank had billed her
for February and March for their monthly service charge on her card,
and then added late fees and interest on the monthly charge . . . the balance
had been $0.00 . . . now was somewhere around $60.00
I placed the following phone call to the bank
Me: "I am calling to tell you that she died in January."
Bank: "The account was never closed and the late fees and charges still
apply."
Me: "Maybe, you should turn it over to collections . . ."
Bank: "Since it is two months past due, it already has been."
Me: "So, what will they do when they find out she is dead?"
Bank: "Either report her account to the frauds division, or report her
to the credit bureau . . . maybe both!"
Me: "Do you think God will be mad at her?"
Bank: "Excuse me?"
Me: "Did you just get what I was telling you . . . the part about her being
dead?"
Bank: "Sir, you'll have to speak to my supervisor!"
(Supervisor gets on the phone)
Me: 'I'm calling to tell you, she died in January."
Bank: "The account was never closed and the late fees and charges still
apply."
Me: "You mean you want to collect from her estate?"
Bank: "... (stammer)" .. "Are you her lawyer?"
Me: "No, I'm her great nephew." (Lawyer info given . . . )
Bank: "Could you fax us a certificate of death?"
Me: "Sure." ( Fax number is given )
(After they get the fax)
Bank: "Our system just isn't set-up for death . . ."
Me: "Oh . . ."
Bank: "I don't know what more I can do to help . . ."
Me: "Well . . . if you figure it out, great! If not, you could just keep
billing her . . . I suppose . . . don't really think she will care . . ."
Bank: "Well . . . the late fees and charges do still apply."
Me: "'Would you like her new billing address?"
Bank: "That might help."
Me: "Rookwood Cemetery (address and plot number given. )
Bank: "But, that's a cemetery!"
Me: "What do you do with dead people on your planet?"
